There I found myself angry and bitter, looking for love and attention and started to fall so deep into the world that I didn't even feel myself! I couldn't hold onto jobs very long because I just didn't take them serious enough. Along with that I was very short tempered. Good paying jobs I would take them for granted. I had a good paying factory job back in the 1990's for the age that I was but ended up getting laid off! The only money that I had coming in was unemployment. It all happened so quickly, first I was working and next I was collecting unemployment checks. Then I was homeless!! This subject can get very emotional for me because it was one of the toughest ordeals that I had to endure.
I found myself headed to a park in Detroit and couldn't believe that it was actually coming to this. There I was approaching the park praying for a last minute miracle and nothing but streaming tears in my eyes. I slowly walked over by a broken down shed that I was not able to go inside of. It was a cold winter and the sound of the frozen grass crunching underneath my feet told me that it was going to be a hard battle ahead! I laid down in front of the broken shed by a rock in the frozen grass supine position and began to cry even more. While snow flakes started to fall on my face I was feeling like no one love me and no one cares about me! The people that I grew up with and was so close to me was always gossiping about me but those same people I had defended. I always came to their defense on other issues that came up very recent but they don't know that. I wish I could explain the feeling of laying there feeling useless, unloved, battered, weak while crying out to Jesus! Very very emotional right now just for me to reflect back on it. While still laying in a supine position my hands began to get really cold along with the rest of my body! There was no one that I could call for help because I was an outcast. Now I really didn't want to call anyone because I felt that I was too ashamed and also was too much of a man and that I needed to handle this myself! Finally, it just got way too cold in that park for me to stay there and after I good while I left. Walking down the street approaching night time was not the best feeling because I didn't know were I was going to go and it just wasn't safe out there.
I remember one day I was walking up and down a main street in Detroit called Woodward. The area of Woodward avenue was not very safe at all! There were all sorts of drug addicts and all of the like on the street! I just couldn't believe that I was actually walking up and down Woodward especially seeing how it had a huge prostitution problem! While walking I'm stepping on trash that littered the streets and other nasty objects. Debating if I was going to the downtown shelter or not. I walked all the way to the shelter and went inside. When I got to the table and looked all around me seeing all the other homeless people, I just couldn't take it and quickly decided not to stay at the shelter.
Another night on the streets wondering what I'm going to eat and where my life is headed. I really didn't have much money on me but I believe I had just enough to make a few emergency phone calls using the pay phone. I knew that I had to use this change wisely. Now I am telling you readers just pieces of my story because it is too much to type it all right now. I contacted my very close friend who is like a brother to me name Ron and was very upset when he found out that I was homeless. There were nights when he would come get me off the streets and I would sleep in the vehicle or he would sneak me into the house. He even put up money for me to stay at different motels. WOW I'm so EMOTIONAL right now just thinking of how he cared about me too break his neck to help me out whenever he could!
Things really was not getting any better for me! Thanksgiving came around and while everyone and their families was in the warm comfort of their own home having a wonderful dinner, their I was having no Thanksgiving laying in a small motel room! I just really felt that I was at rock bottom! I felt like a loser! It was very degrading! Oh why did I leave Jesus! Why? What was I thinking?
Back out in the streets again and was too ashamed to tell some of my female friends at the time so I had to act like I was traveling or something. Now I'm back in downtown Detroit wandering the streets trying to figure out where I'm going to lay my head at for the night. I looked up and saw the Detroit Renaissance center which is now the General Motors building. I walked inside and wandered around as long as possible. I had my portable CD player listening to Kirk Franklin. That was pretty much the only thing at the time giving me some motivation and energy. I found a spot at the payphones and fell asleep. Suddenly I got a rude awaking by this black rude kindergarten cop yelling at me pushing me out of the building! I was back wandering the streets of Detroit in the very early a.m.
I found myself arriving at Detroit metro airport in Romulus, Michigan and it wasn't to catch a flight but to catch some sleep. Many nights I stayed at the airport and pretty much met a lot of the workers there. Sitting around with them on that midnight shift talking and laughing like we were all family or something all the while they had no idea that I was a homeless person. I had them thinking that my flight was on a big delay.
I just didn't know how much more I could take being homeless! I was always cold, hungry and lonely! I remember one night I was wandering up and down some very nasty streets and one of them was called Michigan avenue and Livernois! I would just wander in the nasty bars up and down the street and just sit there lonely and depressed. With no money the bartenders would walk up to me and ask me what drink did I want to order. I would point to someone's empty glass that they left on the table and say that I didn't want any more to drink because I'm driving. Then they would say okay and walk away. It was very scary being out on those streets like that! One night I was on those same streets and it was very cold and snowing. The cold wind was blowing hard to where I had to keep from being pushed backward. It was so cold in Detroit that night that I was freezing like never before. I stopped at a payphone and used my last change in the phone to call for help. When I realized that my help was not showing up then I use what was left in the phone to call for more help. During the time that I was calling for help, someone came up behind me and placed me in a choke hold and robbed me!!!
The Detroit Narcotics unit of the police came and had me to give them a description. They were getting ready to go find him but asked me to come along. We all drove around in their red Crown Victoria squad car looking for them. Then all of a sudden we spotted them. One of the officers asked me if that was him and I said yes! So both officers jumped out of the car one was white and the other officer I believe was Hispanic began to run after them. When they caught up with the guy that robbed me they slammed him to the ground and gave him a whooping!
During the whole time that I was homeless I knew why I was in this situation. It was because I left God. I was not living for God. I claimed that I was a Christian but was not living it. My mind wasn't right! My mind wasn't renewed. My thinking was still the same. I had a carnal mind.
Romans 8:6
For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
All of the time I didn't realize that Jesus was always there with me!
Deuteronomy 31:8
8 And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.”
Matthew 28:20
Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.
John 14:1
Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me.
I was living a very worldly lifestyle while using my tongue as the devil's mouth piece with cursing!
If there is anyone who is reading this and who is not living right but living a very worldly lifestyle then please stop and repent. Ask Christ the Yeshua God to come into your life. It is not worth it allowing yourself to be under the stronghold of Satan like I was. Stop calling yourselves Christians when you are not even living Christ like and that would make you a complete LIAR!
Revelation 21:8
8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Give your whole life completely to Christ and stop half stepping! There are many many bible scriptures that I can give on this. Please repent and make Christ your Lord and Savior! Time is at hand and if you can't see what is going on in this world with all of the evil in it then I pray that the Lord God will open up the eyes of your understanding.
Thanks for reading and please give me your feedback.
I found myself headed to a park in Detroit and couldn't believe that it was actually coming to this. There I was approaching the park praying for a last minute miracle and nothing but streaming tears in my eyes. I slowly walked over by a broken down shed that I was not able to go inside of. It was a cold winter and the sound of the frozen grass crunching underneath my feet told me that it was going to be a hard battle ahead! I laid down in front of the broken shed by a rock in the frozen grass supine position and began to cry even more. While snow flakes started to fall on my face I was feeling like no one love me and no one cares about me! The people that I grew up with and was so close to me was always gossiping about me but those same people I had defended. I always came to their defense on other issues that came up very recent but they don't know that. I wish I could explain the feeling of laying there feeling useless, unloved, battered, weak while crying out to Jesus! Very very emotional right now just for me to reflect back on it. While still laying in a supine position my hands began to get really cold along with the rest of my body! There was no one that I could call for help because I was an outcast. Now I really didn't want to call anyone because I felt that I was too ashamed and also was too much of a man and that I needed to handle this myself! Finally, it just got way too cold in that park for me to stay there and after I good while I left. Walking down the street approaching night time was not the best feeling because I didn't know were I was going to go and it just wasn't safe out there.
I remember one day I was walking up and down a main street in Detroit called Woodward. The area of Woodward avenue was not very safe at all! There were all sorts of drug addicts and all of the like on the street! I just couldn't believe that I was actually walking up and down Woodward especially seeing how it had a huge prostitution problem! While walking I'm stepping on trash that littered the streets and other nasty objects. Debating if I was going to the downtown shelter or not. I walked all the way to the shelter and went inside. When I got to the table and looked all around me seeing all the other homeless people, I just couldn't take it and quickly decided not to stay at the shelter.
Another night on the streets wondering what I'm going to eat and where my life is headed. I really didn't have much money on me but I believe I had just enough to make a few emergency phone calls using the pay phone. I knew that I had to use this change wisely. Now I am telling you readers just pieces of my story because it is too much to type it all right now. I contacted my very close friend who is like a brother to me name Ron and was very upset when he found out that I was homeless. There were nights when he would come get me off the streets and I would sleep in the vehicle or he would sneak me into the house. He even put up money for me to stay at different motels. WOW I'm so EMOTIONAL right now just thinking of how he cared about me too break his neck to help me out whenever he could!
Things really was not getting any better for me! Thanksgiving came around and while everyone and their families was in the warm comfort of their own home having a wonderful dinner, their I was having no Thanksgiving laying in a small motel room! I just really felt that I was at rock bottom! I felt like a loser! It was very degrading! Oh why did I leave Jesus! Why? What was I thinking?
Back out in the streets again and was too ashamed to tell some of my female friends at the time so I had to act like I was traveling or something. Now I'm back in downtown Detroit wandering the streets trying to figure out where I'm going to lay my head at for the night. I looked up and saw the Detroit Renaissance center which is now the General Motors building. I walked inside and wandered around as long as possible. I had my portable CD player listening to Kirk Franklin. That was pretty much the only thing at the time giving me some motivation and energy. I found a spot at the payphones and fell asleep. Suddenly I got a rude awaking by this black rude kindergarten cop yelling at me pushing me out of the building! I was back wandering the streets of Detroit in the very early a.m.
I found myself arriving at Detroit metro airport in Romulus, Michigan and it wasn't to catch a flight but to catch some sleep. Many nights I stayed at the airport and pretty much met a lot of the workers there. Sitting around with them on that midnight shift talking and laughing like we were all family or something all the while they had no idea that I was a homeless person. I had them thinking that my flight was on a big delay.
I just didn't know how much more I could take being homeless! I was always cold, hungry and lonely! I remember one night I was wandering up and down some very nasty streets and one of them was called Michigan avenue and Livernois! I would just wander in the nasty bars up and down the street and just sit there lonely and depressed. With no money the bartenders would walk up to me and ask me what drink did I want to order. I would point to someone's empty glass that they left on the table and say that I didn't want any more to drink because I'm driving. Then they would say okay and walk away. It was very scary being out on those streets like that! One night I was on those same streets and it was very cold and snowing. The cold wind was blowing hard to where I had to keep from being pushed backward. It was so cold in Detroit that night that I was freezing like never before. I stopped at a payphone and used my last change in the phone to call for help. When I realized that my help was not showing up then I use what was left in the phone to call for more help. During the time that I was calling for help, someone came up behind me and placed me in a choke hold and robbed me!!!
The Detroit Narcotics unit of the police came and had me to give them a description. They were getting ready to go find him but asked me to come along. We all drove around in their red Crown Victoria squad car looking for them. Then all of a sudden we spotted them. One of the officers asked me if that was him and I said yes! So both officers jumped out of the car one was white and the other officer I believe was Hispanic began to run after them. When they caught up with the guy that robbed me they slammed him to the ground and gave him a whooping!
During the whole time that I was homeless I knew why I was in this situation. It was because I left God. I was not living for God. I claimed that I was a Christian but was not living it. My mind wasn't right! My mind wasn't renewed. My thinking was still the same. I had a carnal mind.
Romans 8:6
For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
All of the time I didn't realize that Jesus was always there with me!
Deuteronomy 31:8
8 And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.”
Matthew 28:20
Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world. Amen.
John 14:1
Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me.
I was living a very worldly lifestyle while using my tongue as the devil's mouth piece with cursing!
If there is anyone who is reading this and who is not living right but living a very worldly lifestyle then please stop and repent. Ask Christ the Yeshua God to come into your life. It is not worth it allowing yourself to be under the stronghold of Satan like I was. Stop calling yourselves Christians when you are not even living Christ like and that would make you a complete LIAR!
Revelation 21:8
8 But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Give your whole life completely to Christ and stop half stepping! There are many many bible scriptures that I can give on this. Please repent and make Christ your Lord and Savior! Time is at hand and if you can't see what is going on in this world with all of the evil in it then I pray that the Lord God will open up the eyes of your understanding.
Thanks for reading and please give me your feedback.
Posts
Wow, thank you for your obedience in sharing this with the world! May those who read this get revelation on how important Christ is in our lives and avoid the disaster that awaits all who chose to ignore Him.
ReplyDeleteYes! There is so much more to the story but too much to type.
ReplyDeleteHey Bro...
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that you surrendered your entirety to God and he has restored you. You know full well my story also. Even though we were apart for so long I still prayed for you. I am ever grateful for God who through dreams and visions showed us one another and brought us back into this relationship. THAT was all Him!
My story is that a lifetime of womanizing and promiscuity was not what God wanted for me and He knocked me around until I got it together too. I was just remarking to someone today that there was a 3-5 year stretch where I really went through. BUT GOD IS FAITHFUL! He never gave up on me. He never gives up on us. I pray that many would read this and come to the Lord.
That is why we must tell our stories. Thanks for sharing yours.
I love you bro.